We all have gone through this lesson of saying ‘No’, some might be practicing that skill who thinks it is too difficult to say No, some might be really good at it. It is something repeatedly told by many motivational speakers or legends advising you to start saying ‘No’. It is written in many self-help/improvement management books.‘Learn to say No’ is one of the important steps that you will read in any time management article or Steps to improve your organization skills or even in project management training and so on. It becomes important when delegation comes into play, if you are busy you gotta say No. That’s what they train you on. Learning to say ‘No’ is an art and it is treated as one of the transformational skills in your life or in your career. I have been listening to this too and practicing by myself, I am not bad at it, though.
Yesterday was black Friday. My sister and I, along with my 7-year-old niece were on a shopping spree. We went to many shops buying many things on super duper deals. We bought things for my niece too. However, I observed that my niece kept asking my sister to buy whatever she finds interesting. Of course, for a kid in that age likes to buy all she likes. It kind of started annoying, she asks for one or the other item from each and every shop we went and when my sister says ‘No’, she becomes upset and behaves like an older person by not speaking to anyone or keeping her face close or sometimes ignore my sister’s comment and continued with her asking. My sister was exhausted by saying No. One point of time, I was telling my niece, “Nia, you need to learn to accept No as an answer and learn to move on from it”. There is it!!! I wonder is anyone or any article tells us how to learn to accept ‘No’ as an answer.
Isn’t it essential to teach your kid to accept ‘No’ as an answer. She is going to listen to No as an answer to many things she desires, she might listen to a ‘No’ from her crush to go out on a prom date, she might listen a ‘No’ from a job he applied, or it may be small things. She needs to learn to accept that answer as well. It is an important lesson, important as much as we learn to say No.
You will be slapped with No all over your face, sometimes it will be harsh, sometimes it will be a polite one, yet you can neither brood nor take revenge. Yes, you will be rejected yet you should not feel resentful always. There were instances in my life when I ask for a favor and if someone says No, I have at times felt angry or sometimes fretted. I may not have shown my feelings to that person, however, until I am over it I would not be able to talk to that person. That is definitely not a right attitude. We need to start thinking from the receiver side, there may be a million reasons for that person to say No to you. It is certainly not necessary for that person to share the actual reason with you. It sure can be no one’s fault. Just because he or she said ‘No’, shouldn’t make you react in a different way to that person. You cannot wait for your payback time. Just give a minute thought and get over it quickly.
Look at the conversation snapshot below, I found in pinterest.
It is true, they need not reason out to you and you cannot be pestering as well. Learn to accept it and move on.