It’s Okay! – ‘4 min read’

One of my friend let her 3-year-old kid to sit in the front seat because the kid was pleasing her so much and she couldn’t say no to that cute face instead she said, it’s okay, and allowed her kid to sit in the front seat. Can you guess what happened next?

Well, it was not worst but she ended up with traffic ticket (worth double demerit points) and warning from the cop. For real, this cop seems to be nice. But, I thank God that they are safe.

This post is about two words “It’s Okay!”

It is easy to get frustrated and lose interest in our goals and end up saying ‘it’s okay’ to move on. Most of the times, those 2 words, ‘It’s okay’ seems to be the reason for everything that collapses life. When you say it’s okay, everything gets compromised. We all know our mind works in the form of input and output. For every input, you get output. You send in signal for it to respond like a computer programming code.

To your mind, ‘It’s okay’ is a code to stop paying attention now, cool down and relax. When you have not achieved your goal, it can’t be okay. You can’t say it’s okay. That means you are convincing yourself, it doesn’t matter if you don’t do it. If that’s the mind set you have, then there is long way before you could check out any item from your to-do list.

If you have observed keen, you would have realized that procrastination is also caused by the same ‘it’s okay’ mind set. Most of your tasks are postponed by this reason. A simple example, hitting snooze multiple times before we wake up, is because we say it’s okay; convincing ourselves to think it’s okay to sleep for another 5 minutes.

Even in relationships or in marriage, this mind set creates conflicts between couples. Woman thinks it’s okay he can wait for some more time and takes as much as time to groom herself. Man thinks it’s okay not to answer her call now thinking it can wait. When the time pass by they take each other for granted by saying it’s okay and end up in a fight that could have been avoided.

Not to spare, there are instances that even friends became enemies because of the same mind set. A friend thinks it’s okay she is just a friend I don’t need to inform her where I am, although you know she is waiting to hear from you. Another friend thinks it’s okay he is just a friend I can use his car anytime but doesn’t fill the gas even once.

Here is another one, most seen and usual happening under the shield of it’s okay at workplace. Taking stationery items like pen or notepad or markers thinking it’s okay just 1 pen or notepad doesn’t bankrupt the company. But this compromises your ethical behavior at work and you never know how and when it pays off, and trust me it will look bad.

Like such there are much common behaviors like driving above the max speed limit, littering on the neighborhood park and so on. We tend to indulge in such behaviors thinking it’s okay no one is watching. These are just examples, may be even silly ones, but when we think through it we understand how easy it is to compromise the efforts you put until that moment and compromises the reputation you had created so far by uttering it’s okay.

So my friends, let’s try to be responsible and take actions on personal development and from now let it not be okay when it’s not.

There are times in life when those 2 words are necessary, use them when in need and for real.

I would like to list some it’s okays : –

  • Life is an adventure and it’s okay to be nervous;
  • It’s okay to ask for help;
  • It’s okay if someone disagrees with you;
  • It’s okay to be different;

“It’s okay to FAIL but it’s not okay to GIVE UP”

“It’s okay to follow your heart but take your brain with you”

I think those quotes are appropriate for this post and I do not know who wrote it.

Do you think it’s time that you should give up on your goal?  I would say just stick with it and try even harder.

Thank you for reading & Have a great week friends! See you next Tuesday!
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Photo Credit: it’s okay

My Pinky Swear!

I wrote the following 10 golden rules keeping in mind the trouble girls go through during the initial phase of relationship or dating. These are my pinky promises that helped me to avoid those unpleasant phases of dating and it worked well for me. If it works for me, it can help many. So I put them together to share with others.  Remember this 10 rules, I can say that you will be saved from heartbreak. Not just that, it will also save your precious time and save you from your regrets that comes later. It is written to help the ladies and nothing against men. I understand even men goes through heartbreak during relationship/dating. I have no idea if this could apply to guys. If it does and if it works, I am super glad. Let me know.My Pinky Swear

Please remember, this applies to only initial phase, not when you are in relationship and for long time.  Lol!

I hope this could reach as many people as possible in good faith of helping them.

Have a great week friends! See you next Tuesday! homewaredesigns (1)
Photo Credit : Pinky Swear

Give Up!

– less than 3 min read.

There are many reasons behind a person to give up on something. We may give up on a relationship, education, assets, materials, like such there are things in life that belongs to us that we give up, sometimes life itself. Those reasons are out of necessity or by order or out of chastisement and they may or may not be acceptable but failure must never be a reason to give up your fight. When we sleep peacefully at our bed, there are many who are wandering in the street with no place to sit. They don’t give up their life and their life still moves on. It is extremely difficult for us to imagine what kind of fight they are put up with.

There was a boy who at the age of 8 had scaled the face of 11,627-foot (3,544 m) Mount Temple in the Canadian Rockies. At the age of 17, he became one of the best American climbers. In the year 1982, this climber and his fellow climber were caught in a disastrous winter ascent in a very difficult ice route on Mount Washington, they both became perplexed ending up descending into Great Gulf. They had to pass three cold nights at -29ž C. Both the climbers suffered severe frostbites before they were rescued. I’m talking about the prodigy rock climber, Hugh Herr and his fellow climber Jeff Blatzer. Due to the frostbites they suffered, Herr’s both legs were amputated below his knees and Jeff’s lower left leg, right foot toes and right hand fingers were amputated. Herr underwent many surgeries and rehabilitation. Do you know what he did after that? he started climbing again exactly what his doctor told him was unthinkable. He designed his own prosthesis and created prosthetic feet to make him climb again. He was able to work on the advanced leg prosthesis while he was postdoctoral fellow in biomedical devices at MIT. He is the first person who climbed at more advanced levels with such bigger amputation and being able-bodied person.

NewsImage_Hugh-Herr

Can you imagine yourself doing this? For most of us going back to the same classroom where we were humiliated is difficult. He did not GIVE UP except his legs. He did not lose his legs by some accident, he lost them during his climbing journey, the very same sport that he got back after losing his legs. He was able to achieve even better. Using his prosthetic legs, he was able to adjust the height which makes him to get to the heights that were out of reach before.

Ask yourself one question before giving up your fight. WHY? and remember Hugh Herr.
It’s only you who could fight for your dreams, your aspirations, your goals and whatever you want. If you give up, it becomes nothing.

Thank you so much for reading & Have a wonderful week my friends! See you next Tuesday!
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Photo Credits: MIT'S Hugh Herr
Featured Image source: CNN

 

Respect Through Wrong Lens! ‘2 min read’

Here comes my next post with another short story.

This story is about a treasurer who worked at a highly renowned place as a President. On his retirement he became a coach/speaker presenting motivational speeches sharing his experiences at various centers and conferences. One day he was invited for a speech at a hotel where he had been to many times for conference while he was President.

This day while he was at the back stage, he asked for coffee and the hotel assistant pointed him to the pantry where coffee was available on a vending machine. He went there and got coffee in a Togo cup. It made him to think about the days when he used to come to this hotel as a President of treasury department to present speech at the conferences, when he asks for coffee he would be assisted immediately by the hotel supervisor with coffee on a porcelain cup. Now he is holding the coffee in a Togo cup. He noticed the difference of respect that comes in 2 types of coffee cups, Porcelain and Togo.

What he experienced happens everywhere. Title comes with certain respect and you can never ask for equality of treatment.

We always long for growing up the ladder desiring to become CEO, CFO, President or anything that seemed prestigious to us. We always thought how cool it is to feel the respect that came with different titles we earn in our life.

The world certainly has a way taking shapes on our lives and we end up looking at success and happiness using wrong lens.

We cannot avoid those respect that comes with your title. But you can certainly avoid allowing it to define you. We are at a place for a reason and we are where we are. Believing that we have ability to make an impact those around you makes a difference. Be bold and believe what you believe in and live the life completely.

We may have a title at work but defining who you are is at your hands. Never allow the world to define you. If you ask me, I have a title named ‘daughter’ living my life with the joy of responsibilities mixed with sacrifices and achievements.

So, My friends! I am eager to hear from you, What is your title? And What does it define you?

See you next Tuesday!

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Photo Credit: Entrepreneur Article

Think different yet positive! ‘3 min read’

I want to share an amazing inspirational story I listened to recently from a motivational speaker, Darren Hardy.

The story goes like this, a business owner was sitting in a park devastated and worried about the loss he was incurring in his business and did not know where else to go for money to get things going in his business. At that time, an old man came, sat next to him. The Old man asked him, “why are you worried son?”, the business owner told him about his immediate need for money and how his business is going down with loss. The old man says I can help you and hands him a check, saying meet me here on this day after a year to repay me. The old man left the place quickly. The business owner took the check and read the amount of $500,000 signed by John. D. Rockefeller. That’s right, John. D. Rockefeller was the world’s wealthiest man. In shock and extremely joyful, the business owner thought all his money problems had disappeared in an instant. He became optimistic and enthusiastic. He took the check and placed in a safe without making it as cash but keeping it as back up. He started working on the business deals and worked hard for alternatives. Apparently he was able to make to profit with alternative business deals and able to stop the loss that was sinking his business. He still had that half a million dollar check as back up. Days went by and after a year, the business owner returned to the park where he met John. D. Rockefeller with the check. The old man came to the park on the same day however was unmindful of this business owner. The business owner was approaching him to return the check and express his gratitude, suddenly a nurse came running and stopped the business owner. She said He is always escaping rest home and he has been going around telling people that he is John. D. Rockefeller. Nurse apologized that business owner and said that hope he did not bother him. The business owner was stunned and dumfounded that all year long he has been working hard making alternatives dealing his business and made profit with convincing thought that he had a backup of half a million dollars in safe. Suddenly he realized that this money was not real however turned his life around. It was his new found self confidence that gave him the power of achieving anything in his life.

There are 2 morals behind this inspiring story. One is his confidence. His confidence was the reason he was able to experience this massive transformation in his life.

The other moral is that not everyone would use that check in the way this business owner had used it. In fact, he did not use it at all. If it was me, I would have gone to the bank immediately to encash it. I might have ended up in more disappointment and more devastation. That’s why I urge you all my friends to think differently yet positively. That distant vision of being positive of no matter what comes plus commitment and dedication could make anything possible in our life.

I have another inspiring story to share with you all and will be published in my next post. See you next Tuesday.

Have a fantabulous week my friends!

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Blogger Recognition Award!

Thanks a bunch Benjamin – Project Believe In Yourself for nominating me with this award.

Thank you

My journey as a blogger

It’s just been 9 months since I started this blog. I always wanted to connect with people and make a positive impact in their life. This blog is one of such initiative and I hope sharing my learnings and my life experiences could be of help to someone. I find happiness in blogging. It helped me to realize my passion for writing. Blogging is a whole different world out here and it’s like an open sea. It amazes me when I read other’s posts and the comments by other bloggers. Happy to be a blogger!

Advice to other bloggers

As a blogger my advice is to never give up on writing.

Rules

1: Write a post to show your award.
2: Thank the person that nominated you.
3: Briefly describe your journey as a blogger.
4: Give advice to other bloggers.
5: Nominate the deserving ones.

Nomination

  1. 360 Exposure
  2. Emmakwall
  3. Shree
  4. Eloquence & Company
  5. ChattyKerry
  6. ItsMeHarshi
  7. Stephellaneous
  8. Seb Dani
  9. Fantastic Number
  10. Vanessence
  11. Equinoxio21
  12. Heykaait
  13. 5haili
  14. Pattern$ oF R@nD0mNEsS
  15. FrankSolanki
  16. brokenvase
  17. thelonelyauthorblog
  18. Networkgirlcloud
  19. a.r.writer
  20. Natalielovelyblog
  21. darculavenhelsing
  22. Lavieenrose2196
  23. Bubblesandbeebots
  24. meoverdose
  25. Bigandpinkytoes

I do not just blindly nominate bloggers for the award here. I nominate you guys because I truly believe you are amazing. I understand if any of you are award free bloggers or do not want to receive any award, if so, please ignore it. Thank you 🙂

Have a fantastic week and see you next Tuesday!
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Fast & Faster! ‘2 min read’

Yesterday I watched a conversation between my sister and her daughter. My sister was suggesting my niece to spend 2 hours a day for studies which my niece agreed and she quickly started planning her 2 hours’ schedule with the homework my sister assigned to her. The homework was learning math, cursive writing, and reading. She said that “Mom if I do these work quickly I would be able to finish them within an hour and I don’t need 2 hours, but if I do these nicely then I would need 2 hours”

And ironically we had a discussion in my MBA class last week about intrinsic motivation and we talked about an experiment conducted by Harvard economist, Roland Fryer on the school students and the experiment was to pay students if they perform well and there were other tests too.  His experiment did face criticism including death threats, however he did conduct the experiment in 4 cities. The results were surprising, because not all the students performed well despite this offer. In this discussion I supported that intrinsic motivation like being self-determined yields long term benefit and effect of extrinsic motivation such as monetary rewards last for only short while.  I also said that if a student studies with an eager to learn from the book then that becomes intrinsic motivation and that motivation will help him to take much effort to understand the material better. If the same student does the studying for the sake of receiving cash rewards, he would finish his studying sooner without having the need to understand the material by taking efforts but to quickly receive the reward. The experiment was all about motivating students. Not everyone supports this experiment because money is not enough and it never is. However, for kids, it may be part of the solution. In the end, we want kids to be self-motivated not by such rewards right?

In this digital world like ours, most things are trivialized and their values are confused. We want everything to be done quickly and at speed. We need faster internet speed, we need laptop that boots up quickly, we need faster transportation to reach destinations sooner. There are more and more innovations towards making things faster.  The things that humankind do not fully comprehend their value are easily trampled underfoot and discarded with calm indifference.

My thoughts are that doing things quicker may be required but how do we do it efficiently after all we are not machines or robots right? I believe…. that we need to develop grit and it is very important. Perseverance and passion for long term goals are as important while getting things done quickly. I believe observing more value from what we learn will help us in future.

I would love to hear your thoughts and suggestions on how you survive in this fast world?

There is more to life than simply increasing its speed – Mahatma Gandhi

Photo Credit: Adsoftheworld

See you next Tuesday!
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Horrible!!!Heart Breaking!!!

Where this world is heading to with such violence? what kind of exchange do they get in killing people? what are they accomplishing by this atrocious act? Why can’t they use their intelligence to get what they want in peace? All this hatred, vengeance is not coming from someone who worships God. Everyone has their own right. What joy you get in hating people if they are homosexuals? If you have a problem, go and get yourself checked. I am a Christian and I do not have any difference of opinion about LGBT community. They are my brothers and sisters too. Whatever may be the choice of a person, if you believe in God, you will believe in loving your neighbors which is the first commandment.

Each person who is hatred against someone should be transformed into what they hate.

All these are not going to stop. I don’t see an end to this violence. It seems like chain reaction. One person does something wrong to another and the other person becomes a terror and this is continuing. Please learn to love regardless of the characteristics. Life is too short to live a life like this. Leave the hatred and voice out your problem. Do not take gun to show your hatred.

A tragedy can never be reversed. By taking control in your hands is never going to bring back what you lost. There are so many people joining such violence at their own will that’s more horrifying.  People are gaining easy access to weapons and to the dark world. This is not the country you want. Strengthen the regulations, stop issuing license to sell gun. This is clearly a huge gun control problem. This should be banned.

Again people, please do not take this as chance to hate another. The person who did this was an individual and whatever hatred he had was from him as an individual and not from any group or religion to blame.

Earlier it was mass shooting at Virginia Tech killing 32 people and now it is at Orlando killing 50 people and 50 more people wounded. Deadliest is not the only word to all this. We need to look for ways to stop this. LOVE is the only way out I see. Please spread love.

My deepest thoughts and prayers to the victims and the LGBT community.

Picture Courtesy : Elitedaily
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The Driving Factor! ‘3 min read’

As promised here is my next post to ‘Vision of life

I have observed whenever I make a resolution or commit to a work, I will be on that sprint of mood to finish it right away and I will be able to finish it too, because I will be on fire to get things done. I will be happy and feel accomplished once it’s done and I will even ask for more work like such. Well, all these in the case of small commitments 😀

What happens to me when it’s something that takes time even longer like a yearly resolution. First day I will be super active, second day I will be active but not like the first day and I will get through the first week this way. Eventually that sprint of mood I mentioned earlier, I will almost forget that word. I will reach that state of ‘It’s okay’, It’s okay I have time, I will do it tomorrow and I will be queen of procrastination the next 2 days. The third day I will be guilty of being queen 😦

Again I will become conscious and become active. Even if I am not truly active, I will make sure I will motivate myself and get me into action and  I will say Yay!!!. This will continue for good 2 weeks. This goes on and on until the deadline of the challenge I accepted meaning the resolution I took. I have been in these days. I have been in these years. I am over it! I am glad I found ways to succeed. In my other article What happens to you after your ‘Success’? ,I had written about not making yearly resolution as #101 trick.

Like me, there are many out there who have found their ways to kill procrastination and get into action. There are still many who wants help and tricks to get that driving factor to be consistent. Not all the tasks or resolutions we commit to are small to finish off quickly. Like I said earlier, some takes time even longer like a yearly resolution. Like the day passes that mood fades too. It is easy to make a decision or a resolution when you are in that mood.  You see an inspiring video about working out in the morning and you make up your mind that you are going to work out every morning. That mood may last one minute or a day or a month. Once you lose that mood, you cannot do what you had planned to do. That’s how people fail in their resolution. That’s when the resolution becomes repeated and never ending. That’s when feeling frustration enters and you will get to say yeah I know this will not work out. You will easily give up and that definitely is not helping you to be consistent.

The key is “Like”. You need to like what you do.  You are the one who made that decision or commitment, so you better start liking it and continue liking it more.

Imagine if you don’t like a book after reading first 2 pages, it is better that you stop wasting more time in that book and pick a different book that keeps you interested. You can’t do the same for your resolution, you can’t change it every now and then. When you can love the same person and be in relationship with that same person for many decades. You can certainly develop the liking towards what you do even if it’s difficult. If you read my article on Love at first sight.Really??? you will understand what I mean by liking it and continue liking it more.

Start liking what you do.

The secret to happiness is not in doing what one like, but in LIKING what one does – James M.Barrie

If in case you are not in mood, do things you like that is quick and start feeling accomplished by doing them. When you get that sense of achievement, you would want to do more to achieve more. The more you achieve the more you want to do.

#102 Trick: That’s why they say do your bed when you wake up so you start your day with accomplishment.

See you next Tuesday! Follow my blog with Bloglovin
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Vision of life! ‘3 min read’

Have you ever wondered why do we feel frustrated quickly and take a long time to come out of that mood? Why does failure hit us like a tornado in life? Why do we take each silly disappointment too personally? Why do we get so defensive if someone questions you out of no-where? It even makes you to snap at them saying you have no rights. Psychologists say that such behavior are as a result of lacking confidence in ourselves. I have been through this in my life too. But why do we lack confidence?  I did find the answer and that is

     ———————–I DON’T KNOW WHO I WANT TO BE——————

True, being yourself, is one thing and being yourself like what, is another thing. If you don’t know who you want to become, it is very simple you can’t become one except for one thing, you will lack confidence. Julia_Gillard_2010

If Julia Eileen Gillard had not dreamt of becoming a prime minister, she could not have achieved the success of becoming the first and to-date only woman prime minister of Australia. If she had not constantly tried and stood for elections she could not have been elected. Of Course, all this did not happen overnight. She started her political aspirations when she was in her second year at the university, almost at the age of 20. It is not easy to hold a top level position; it takes lot of confidence to be with.

There are many times in life that you would not know what you want to be, who you want to become, that’s when frustration enters. People who are successful in life did know who they want to be and anytime they face failure they are back up quickly because they are determinant to who they want to become. When there are disappointments in life, successful people would be able to move on quickly because they have a goal and they don’t have time to mourn over what happened in the past. How can they do it? It is their mind and it helps them to do it. Their mind constantly reminds them about it. Well if their mind is reminding them that means they are feeding their minds with that thought. Mind will not act on its own. It will respond with what you feed into it. If you cannot train or program your mind to think what you want it to think, it’s easy to give up in life.

Here’s when CONSISTENCY plays a role. You need to be consistent in aspiring what you want to be. If you want to lose some pounds, you need to be consistent in working out. If you want to be a speaker, you need to be consistent in preparing yourself by reading materials, joining training sessions and by consistently practice speaking. If you are married, be consistent to love your partner. There is a famous adage, success does not happen overnight. That’s true very true, it needs consistency.

I tried the following and I still do this:-

  1. Write down who you want to become? (Example: I want to be early riser, I want to be committed to my goal, I want to be a person who keep up my words and so on)
  2. Determine what you need to do… to become that person?

Now start practicing it every day and be consistent in doing what you have planned to do so.

Being consistent develops confidence. If you are confident, there is going to be nothing that stops you from reaching your goals. Don’t you agree with me? What do you do at the time of frustration? Please share your thoughts with us.

In my next post, I’m going to share what is that one ingredient that helped me with consistency 🙂 See you next Tuesday!homewaredesigns (1)