#8 A trick to make you feel good good

Employee: Submits the difficult task within critical deadline.

Manager: No reaction.

Annie: Annie invites her friend Sheila for the dinner party.

Sheila: Sheila attends the party, enjoys the dinner and leaves.

Well, what do you think about this? It doesn’t look good, right? Manager and Sheila are missing something.

You ask for help from your neighbor and you do not take an effort to acknowledge it, do you think your neighbor is going to help you again?

Annie is not going to have a nice feel about Sheila not acknowledging her friend about the efforts she put for the dinner party.

The employee is not going to be motivated next time for a task from that manager who does not acknowledge his work.

Why am I talking about acknowledgment? Today my sister had been to her friend’s place for a birthday party and she returned home with a gift bag. I asked her why is that whenever there is a get-together or birthday party, there is a return gift. Why do they waste money? I’m sure they are already spending money for the party. Then why all this formalities? She replied that ‘this a way of acknowledgment to let me know that she appreciated my presence in the party’. Wow, that’s right.

That’s how my today’s thought stirred around acknowledgment. I started thinking how many acknowledgments I received at work, from family, friends etc. Likewise, I do take many efforts to acknowledge others.  How much special I felt about it <3. It is both ways when I received acknowledgments as well as when I acknowledged others, I feel so good about it ^^’.

There was an instance when one of my junior team members worked on a task with me at a crucial deadline and we did it successfully. Once the work is complete, I received appreciation from our managers as I was directly assigned to that task. I walked up to him and appreciated his hard work and announced to our team members about his hard work and he received a huge applaud from all. I wanted his work to be recognized and appreciated. To my surprise, he did not say anything, he was silent and returned to his work. I felt embarrassed thinking I did something wrong. Days passed, he came to my desk one day and told me that he did not know how to react when he was appreciated as no one had ever appreciated him like that. He was overwhelmed and did not know what to say. Not knowing how to react for an appreciation made him think about it a lot and it took him days to understand it. He told me that he is now able to receive what I had done and it did help him a lot. I knew that day that acknowledgment definitely makes a positive impact in a person. It is a good thing to offer and we should not shy away from that.

We try ways to make people feel good and special. A simple acknowledgment like a gift, thank you card, appreciation letter, acknowledgment email, a big smile:-D etc. does that trick of making you and the others  feel good good ❤

Don’t forget the trick next time 🙂

#6 Buy or compromise???

Lately, my mind is fluctuating between 2 thoughts :- one. wanting to buy; two. compromise. I’m sure the moment you read this, most of you must be saying that learn to feel content with what you have than to buy. But my question here is how long should I keep compromising on my needs. ‘Need’, isn’t that a major term.

Have you heard about Maslow’s hierarchy of needs? There you can see below about that theory.

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  1. Biological and Physiological needs – air, food, drink, shelter, warmth, sex, sleep, etc.
  2. Safety needs – protection from elements, security, order, law, stability, freedom from fear.
  3. Love and belongingness needs – friendship, intimacy, affection and love, – from work group, family, friends, and romantic relationships.
  4. Esteem needs – achievement, mastery, independence, status, dominance, prestige, self-respect, and respect from others.
  5. Self-Actualization needs – realizing personal potential, self-fulfillment, seeking personal growth and peak experiences.

(Cited: http://www.simplypsychology.org/maslow.html)

Don’t you agree with me that basic needs or the deficit of needs is the main motivation for humans?

According to Maslow, he came up with this theory for peoples’ motivation and how they are motivated based on their needs and what levels do they reach in terms of needs. He believed that people possess a set of motivation for rewards or unconscious desires. He said that when a person is fulfilled with one need, he seeks to fulfill his next need. That’s what his hierarchy of needs talks about. When there is a need we tend to make unconscious desire.

Necessity plays a role. If there is a need we prepare and make arrangements for it.

Likewise, if you do not want more or wish for more, how would you work towards that reason? Is it not called settling down when you just feel content with what we have? How would you keep moving up in the ladder, when you do not want to get promoted and just feel content with your current position?

Only if you wish for buying a new car, you will start working on a plan to buy that new car. A plan like improving your budget, savings, etc.

Don’t we advise people, do what you like and firm with what you need. So compromising your need is not a good suggestion, keeping in mind that each situation is different and you alone could analyze your situation and make up your mind.

Self-actualization and realization must be present when we desire for something. There is nothing wrong in wanting to buy if I do not have it. There is nothing wrong in improvising what you have, it’s like cope up with the present. Having a mobile phone is a basic necessity in this century, mostly, you cannot say I have a landline, I do not need a mobile phone. Well, you cannot carry a landline in your pocket. Period. It’s about improvising and cope up with the world and the needs.

Back to my questions, wanting to buy or compromise. To help my mind with these questions, I have decided to use a simple trick. I will ask myself, ‘do I have it already? & what is the need?’

Let me finish it with my quote 🙂

Desires are not wrong, when the needs are right.

#1 The nerd’s guide to evolve!

The Cartographers (the map makers) were following some trick in earlier days and did you know that they insert fake places on their map?  Do you know why?

Because when that fake place shows up in another person’s map, he will be caught stealing the map.

Well this is one of the interesting old facts I got to know today and I will let you know in this blog from where I learned this. The main context of this post is about community.

My friend and I was walking the walk this evening and we were discussing about how do we keep learning, keep updating our knowledge base in mind. How is it possible if you are alone? And when we were deeply sailing into our conversation we reached a point where I was asking her, should we not be around with people like how we want to be? Like if you want to be a leader, think like a leader. Well wait! Do you all of sudden start thinking like a leader? No, for the start, you will look at your hero or an inspired leader to try their footsteps, unlike the people who are born with the talent of being a leader. She immediately agreed to me saying, true, that’s one of the ways that people improve a lot in career and even life. People become more smart hanging out with smart people. We keep evolving.

No wonder why people say avoid groups which creates negative environment. Isn’t that true?

Besides the fact that the major influence of improving or updating yourself is self-interest and strong determination, spending time with leaders, mentors, like-minded people, listening to motivators, speakers, all these gives you more window to evolve.

It was such a coincidence that I found this inspiring TED talk by John Green, the author of “The Fault in Our Stars” and “Paper Towns”.  He speaks about community and the several ways to join communities that interests you. You won’t be alone again 🙂 He mentions in this speech about that interesting trick maintained by the cartographers in earlier days.

Leave your ideas of evolving in comments, would be glad to know more.